Waiting for Love

Somewhere in our consciousness, is a reflection of a dream... .a dream of someone we think as very special to us.... someone that we always wanted to be our partner in life.... someone we do not know but whose foggy images lie entrenched in the depths of our consciousness, often unknown to us.... but the truth is that all of us have somewhere in the deep recesses of our heart a picture of the love that we desire and we expect in our hearts.....

Dil Mein Basi Hui Hai Tasveer Yaar Ki,
Jab Jee Chhahi, Nazar Jhukaayee, Dekh Li

The pursuit of a perfect love is often a difficult task One spends his entire life looking for that elusive reflection, that suauve image, that silent desire and many a times it's remains just that .... a dream. It's not that one desires always a perfect person. To be frank, Nobody wants a lover with a perfect figure, face and features... all one wants is a heart full of love and a soul full of care, faith and integrity, someone who is an exact replica of the image in the heart. As Shailendra once said:

Chand Si Mehbooba Ho Meri Kab Aisa Maine Socha Tha?
Haan.... Tum Bilkul Waisi Ho... Jaisa Maine Socha Tha!

We may call it the Mr. Right or Miss Perfect Syndrome or by whatever else we feel it to be but the truth remains that all of us spend a great deal of our time trying to find that love.... some search for that elusive non-existent ideal all through the lives ..... every person we meet is often compared to that reflection in our minds ... and then accordingly accepted or rejected....... this continues day after day, month after month, year after year .... the heart breaks and again smiles in hope of a better tomorrow... and again bites the dust....

And then one day defeated by the continuous frustrations and deviations from what we assume to be the perfect comrade for us on the way of life, we lay down our weapons... we sacrifice our love... our desires on the altar of that ever-silent, ever-patient but ruthless spider of our life - the Society.... and like any other Spider, Society devours us ruthlessly and completely, leaving nothing but a husk of what could have been a dream.. all shattered, all destroyed at the altar of the practical realm of life. His lips quiver to the sound of that beautiful emotion that says......

Aayengi Bahaaren, To Teri Hi Fassane Sunaayengi Humen
Hogi Tanhaaiyee To Ankhiyon Mein Aake Rulaayegi Humen
Rulaayengi Humen..... Tadpaayengi Humen

And then softly and slowly without turning back walks on.... he is mindful of his dreams being left on the middle of the road, orphaned and devastated... the tears fall but the man walks on, fearing that one day his own heart would betray him if we stopped and turned back to the world....

It takes guts but Man finally accepts the cards dealt out by the hands of Fate and starts adjusting his own self to his resigned fate.... the memory of that dream that stirred his heart in the early days of his life slowly fades away until one day Man remembers that he has become just another creature in this carnival of life... shorn of all his hopes and aspirations, he becomes just another person. And we console our hearts by saying consistently,

Hum Kyoon Shiqwaa Karen Jhoota!
Kya Hua Jo Dil Toota?
Mitti Ka Khilona Tha; Kuch Na Kucch Hona Tha
Hua!

And then when everything is lost, God suddenly decides that He exists.... that he has to show he 'exists' and so to add salt to the wound.. he decided to play benovelent.. by you have lost everything - your dreams, your desires, your love and reconciled yourself to the vagaries of life - to a life without love, to a life shorn of happiness, to a life wedded to loneliness and then suddenly when you think that "jee lenge" - God decides to present you with that image, that reflection that you have reflected upon so many times in solitude..... an image that's now more inaccessible then before....

And then your heart starts asking you a question..... As usual he is emotional and refuses to listen.. all it wants is to get it's beloved in his embrace while on the other hand the mind, mindful of the practicalities of the situation refuses to let it go...

Josh Kehta Hai Ki Chal,
Hosh Kehta Hai Sambhal,
Kiska Kehna Maan Loon?
Manzil Hai Mere Saamne!

And then begins a battle between the loving heart and the loving but pained mind..... a battle that tears apart the soul, the mind and the heart... a battle that has no end... they are lucky who are successful but even so are those who lose.. because what wins is LOVE!

And another story begins......